Don’t Be Yourself

It’s Monday morning. You’ve been preparing all weekend for what many dread – A job interview. You ask your friends for guidance. What’s their all-common response?

Just be yourself’ – A platitude that initially sounds like solid advice, but as you’re about to find out only hinders your ability to progress in life.

Being yourself is not good enough

We all have unique dispositions. No two people are ever the same. But the advice to always be yourself is useless because it assumes that you’re fine just the way you are; That trying to change who you are is fake and futile; That if it’s meant to be, it will happen because a magical, elusive force in the universe says so.

I suppose it is comforting – That who we are is already enough… But what if that’s not the case? What if who you currently are is just not good enough for that job interview, at least not yet.

So what then?

You have 2 choices:

  1. Remain the same and excuse your life as faith.


  1. Confront the possibility that you might actually not be good enough.

Now the second option is a tough pill to swallow, but it’s also the truth.

The truth hurts but remember: You can use this pain as fuel to change. Accepting the painful truth that who you currently are may not be enough for what is you want, is an opportunity for growth.

When we accept this, we go from a ‘Fixed Mindset’ of seeing problems as immovable objects to instead a Growth Mindset – Seeing problems as opportunities to grow.

There’s a great book called ‘Mindset’ by Carol Dweck. She goes into great depth about how you can adopt a growth mindset and explains how a fixed mindset leads to a never-ending cycle of self-doubt and disappointment.

So what’s the solution?

Be who you want to become.

Imagine the best version of yourself and strive towards that. But before you do, you need to have a clear picture of how this version of you walks, talks, and everything in between – What are their relationships like; How do they handle problems, and so forth.

Adopting a Growth Mindset forces you to give an honest account of your current level, where your gaps are, and how you can improve.

How to Growth Mindset

  • See your problems and shortcomings as an opportunity to learn and grow.
  • Become inspired by the success of others. Having a growth-minded mindset means you emulate those who have achieved some form of success. Don’t get mad. Get better.
  • Regularly define and audit where it is you’re not living up to your own ideals and values with full acceptance.

So don’t be yourself. Be better. Be your future self.

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Will Elkin
2 years ago

I take so much away from these articles like you wouldn’t believe Alex.

Post more often please!

William Hobday
2 years ago
Reply to  Will Elkin

Amen to that, extremely valuable shit

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